Please watch Margaret's vlog here or enjoy the text below it.
I have lived on my own for many years now, apart from my canine family members, who are no longer with me.
My son used to come here for a part of his holidays through uni and when he started working. So I did have company when other families were gathering to celebrate whatever festival was going on.
But in 2013 he went to Papua New Guinea to help them to set up their teacher training at a new college in the highlands. He was away from the UK for 2 years. No visits, poor internet where he was and letters took weeks.
Which meant that I faced national holiday times on my own. My diet restrictions made me wary of accepting invitations to other people’s gatherings.
Having already recovered by using the Gupta program I had a full toolbox of techniques to help me.
I prepare myself for any public holiday times, firstly by using acceptance, since being on my own wasn’t something I could (or wanted to) change.
If I feel like it, I put suitable decorations around my house, especially in my front windows, to give a bit of pleasure to passers by. I buy in some treats as regards food, but not too many! I even treat myself by buying something I would like as a gift to me from me (I save up for this, since I can, but wouldn't miss it if I couldn’t.)
So I have pre-arranged some fun and joy for myself.
If I get a little quirk of sadness I can use the full amygdala retraining technique or the Surrender meditation followed by the Contentment meditation (both meditations are freely available to anyone on the Meaning of Life Experiment App, which Ashok and the team produced a few years ago. www.themeaningoflife.tv .)
Or I might just do eye-smiling, which always uplifts my spirits, or sing my stop song which I use a lot to banish any negative feelings or thoughts, when the full amygdala retraining technique would take more time than I think I have.
I go out for walks, meditating with nature wherever I am, stopping to look closely at anything which interests me, not attempting a world record at route marching or speed walking. Not measuring the time or the distance, because it doesn’t matter when I get home.
I enjoy my own company, I love to be able to decide when and where and what I do, although I am also happy to have company, when circumstances allow, it isn’t essential for my happiness.
Always I am just me as I was meant to be, no pretence, no trying to change. Ashok’s meditations helped me to become “just me, being.”
Margaret Cory
Having been forced to stop working aged 53 due to CFS, I was later diagnosed with Fibromyalgia as well. (With the added challenges of hypersensitivity to chemicals, smells, various foodstuffs, bright light, noise, etc.)
10 years later I found the Gupta Program and started my recovery. Wanting to pay back some small part of what I owe the Gupta Program I later volunteered to be a moderator in the Facebook Gupta Forum.
Hi Margaret. I really enjoyed this post. We’re conditioned to believe that we need to be with someone or other people to feel safe and happy when many of us do really need time on our own. It’s so empowering that you’ve come to value this and cherish yourself in this way.